When I was diagnosed with low thyroid function, I began to entertain the idea that I was now a flower wilting into middle age, that maybe I justcouldn’t do and sustain everything anymore. I considered that maybe at this point in my life I actually needed to slow down and do less in order to feel clear and connected. I considered that I was being carried along toward my own death, that this was part of the natural cycle and winding down of life. e notion of living a life in connection with myself and the Divine was relieving and calming.
Then the masculine Do-er part of me kicked in. The part that wants to be able to do all I want for as long as I want, without limits. The part of me, surely influenced by cultural values and messages, that has an opinion that I should be able to continue “doing it all;” that to change my approach would be to cave in, give up, lose. I pushed the concept of a different lifestyle away and continued working full time, having a side business, and being strongly involved in my spiritual work and community. I functioned like this for several years, until one day at work, I was expected to stretch and expand one too many times. The membrane I had pulled so often finally began to tear and I began to believe that I could not continue in this way any longer. (excerpted from Calling Myself Home.)
This was the start of my real life change. The moment that defined how I would live the rest of my life. Would I continue to do do push force run hurry to be good enough and “successful” as a human being? (And where did I learn that?) Or would I listen within, follow my heart’s inclinations and life my life as I wanted to from now on. No matter what anyoneelse thought or spat?
I chose the latter, obviously – that is why I’m here writing to you, offering courses, coaching and my book. To help you come to the same point, and more, to take your hand and help you cross over the threshold. Into the life you want. The life of your making. The one you were made for and don’t want to die without having experienced fully.
Does that resonate?
Finding vs. Reclaiming
So, are we finding or reclaiming our midlife?
Finding midlife implies you don’t or never had it, and you want it.
This could be the true state. In our modern western culture, we aren’t taught or modeled what midlife is about or looks like, especially as women.
We are expected to keep going, to never stop.
What happens to aging then? How does our natural “maturation” process fit in to the “never die, never give up” cultural message?
We are part of nature. Nature moves in cycles. It’s just that simple and that way.
We change. Our energy is less. Our consciousness is more. We’ve learned through our experiences, including regrets. We’ve served others for decades.
Midlife is time for culling and harvesting our wisdom and moving in our own direction.
That takes strength, confidence and trust. Because our culture isn’t saying to do that. Likely your family and people you know aren’t all understanding and supporting the next volume that your life story is calling you toward.
You feel you need to findyourself at midlife. Because you don’t know what it is. No-one’s ever shown you. You feel alone in this. Only you’re not, because we’re all in this together.
This having-forgotten-what-is-womanhood–whatis moving through the stages of maiden, mother, crone? It’s all denied in our society. And so, if and that you’ve forgotten is not your fault. But it is something to grieve. And to stir awake. For your own fulfillment.
It may be hard to think of the stage of midlife you find yourself in as a reclaiming. First, because you’ve never been in midlife before in this life, so how can you know what you haven’t experienced?
There is a seed, a knowing, maybe dormant, but it is our nature. It is the power and strength of what womanhood is.
For some, and arguably for all of us, there is a seed, a knowing, maybe dormant, but it is our nature. It is the power and strength of what womanhood is. The aspect of the masculine/feminine/yin/yang duality we hold.
We’ve forgotten because it was drilled out of us by our patriarchal culture. Why do you think our European masculine thinking ancestors worked so hard to conquer and control nature, and to deny spirituality? Because the feminine, intangible, mysteriousness and power of life scared them. They didn’t know how to connect with it for no fault on their part. Their solution was to collectively find another way.
The way of mental, rational, logical, left-brain, scientific thinking. And all these masculine qualities (we all have both masculine and feminine aspects,) were put into focus and force to overtake the feminine, which some say had a direct and conscious affect on the suppression and negation of natural woman power and knowing. Case in point: the burning of witches, whose innate powers of healing and intuition were met with violent attempts at annihilation.
If you’re a woman whose ancestral witchy embers remain smoldering within, you may receive the midlife change as a reclaiming.
A third option
Perhaps the finding and igniting of your midlife, and the direction your path is showing you, meets at claiming.
Claiming your wisdom and intuition.
Claiming your right to determine your life from here on out.
Claiming your responsibility to show up and exhibit wakefulness and intention in your world as the unique creature you are.
If you are like me when you read those words, there is a hush, and chills. You are transported to and areroots in the cool, damp mother earth. So, let’s dig in right now. Not so simple or direct a process, especially when you’ve grown up in modern western patriarchal culture.
Where is the compass?
It’s here, right now, and the needle is pointing not in one of the cardinal directions, but clearly downward. Into the dark mysterious power and source of life. The unique ray and gravitational pull that flows from you to the core of the planet and back again.
This is where you can connect with what it yours to claim, now, finally, as a woman who has lived enough lies and is ready to drop that cloak. You, a woman whose peaceful, inner-affirming power is due.
To help you plunge ever deeper in this very moment, I’ve made a worksheet for you with prompts that will call you further into your unique and ancient wisdom. Click here now to receive your FREE "Claiming Your Crone" gift.
There's no cost, no obligation. I made Claiming Your Crone to help you deepen your connection with You at this stage in your journey, and to help you skip (or hobble) joyfully along your path as the YOU you are free and ready to claim, now. ❤️
Robin Rainbow Gate
I help people midlife and beyond to find their inner power, health and well being through slow, conscious living
Ready to live Your True Life?