I sure know what it's like to want security, as slippery as it is to grasp and hang on to, moving target that it is.
Security is still something I long for. What does that mean? I would like life, my understanding of it, my happiness with it to be permanent and unchanging. I would like to always have extra money in my wallet that would more than cover any expense that might arise. I think I would be permanently happy then. For you perhaps it's money, or the ideal relationship that you are convinced would bring you what you want and need.
The reality is, things change: Jobs end, health issues arise, parents get ill and we leave our lives as we knew them to care for them, relationships change and may not last the way we had hoped. What do we do?
I remember reading a quote by Peace Pilgrim that said:
How often are you worrying about the present moment? The present moment is usually all right. If you're worrying, you're either agonizing over the past which you should have forgotten long ago, or else you're apprehensive over the future which hasn't even come yet. We tend to skip over the present moment which is the only moment God gives any of us to live.
Here's what you do:
The reality is, there is only one source of safety and it lies in the present moment, which is always fine.
- Stop. Just stop for a moment.
- Take a breath. Force yourself to take two more. Deep ones.
- Close your eyes and feel the present moment. What is there? What sounds do you hear? What sensations do you feel?
- Be aware of judgements. Sweep them to the side for the moment. If they are waving their arms in the air for your attention, listen to their stories briefly and ask yourself, "Is that really true? Am I 100% certain it's true?" See what feeling arises and return your attention to the present moment.
- Notice: How is it? Is anything really wrong?
And this is how we experience security: in the constant embrace of Now.
Maybe it sounds trite, but it's true. All the peace, trust, gratitude that we long for, the sense of "All is Well", is right here, where you are. I invite you to keep this little trick in your pocket and try it next time you are seeking security.
Let me know how it goes!